Covers and Alibis

As I'm writing this, I'm taking Trans-related books of my shelves and counters in the downstairs portion of my house in a swift effort to transproof it for my grandfather when he visits today. This got me to thinking, what's the point? I, along with an army of transsexuals, am guilty of putting off coming out long after I became sure of my path. In the two years I've spent hiding therapist appointments, endocrinologist visits, and shopping with my girlfriends, I hve actually gained nothing but more wasted time with my family. I know believe that there is nothing to be gained from hiding anything because now every moment I spend with these people feels like a complete facade. Even if I can't completely transition for a few months, virtually all my friends at school know, my mother knows, and I feel great being around them because there are no secrets. I think I just need to do it quick like a bandaid and get the rest of my family over with. No longer will I have to pretend that urging me to do male things hurts me, and I will be no one but myself. I know it's time and I plan to end this soon.